My Rational Response to The Matt Walsh Blog on Depression and Suicide

First, let me say that I don't hate Matt Walsh.  Unlike many of those who have responded to him, I don't think he's a monster and I don't wish harm to him or any of his loved ones.  Honestly, on more than one occasion I have found myself agreeing with Walsh's counter-cultural opinions and blog posts.  I actually find some similarities between Matt Walsh and myself.  I don't even disagree with everything he said about depression and suicide.  However, I do think he was wrong about some things, and I would like to talk about them now.

One of the major things that stood out to me from his post (which you can read here), is that Matt Walsh was obviously speaking as someone who has dealt with some kind of depression in his own life.  As someone who has done the same, I would never even begin to discount anyone who claims to struggle with such a thing.  What I will say, is that I think Walsh fails to acknowledge that there are many kinds of depression.  The Mayo Clinic defines depression as "a mood disorder that causes a persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest."  Call me crazy, but that sounds like it covers and incredibly broad spectrum of conditions.  I believe there are some forms of depression that are purely emotional in their origin and some that have a physical or chemical cause as well.  In simple terms, that's to say that there are some people who deal with depression as a result of life circumstances that are extremely difficult to deal with and others who deal with depression as a result of their body being inhibited or incapable of producing the chemical reaction which our brains interpret as feelings of happiness.  Both are completely legitimate but I would argue very different in how they effect a person and how they need to be treated.  I'm not a doctor or a psychologist and there may be a million other forms of depression that I'm not addressing, but I'm intimately familiar with these two (I would be happy to share my experiences but in the interest of keeping this blog under a eleventy billion words, I would ask that you contact me directly with any questions).

The reason it is important to recognize that depression comes in different forms is because it means making a generalized statement of any kind about the condition will probably not be accurate in a large number of circumstances.  It is entirely possible that in the instances of depression Matt Walsh has struggled with, suicide seemed like a choice and he chose to live.  And I say with 100% sincerity, thank God he did.  That being said, I also believe there are forms of depression where suicide is not a choice, its the tragic end of a disease that has infected someones life.  I will use diabetes (type 1) as an example, if for no other reason than I can speak about it with some authority having lived with it for 20 years.  As a diabetic, I am resigned to the fact that my diabetes will some day take my life.  But you know the funny thing is that it probably won't be from a fluctuation in my blood sugar when it happens.  It will probably be from heart disease, or kidney failure, or a stroke.  All of these things will be direct results of being a diabetic, but none of them are actually diabetes themselves.  So when Matt Walsh says that depression doesn't kill people, suicide does, he is right, but only in the sense that I am right when I say diabetes won't kill me.

That brings me to another point where I disagree with Mr. Walsh.  He says that suicide doesn't happen to you, that it doesn't attack you like cancer.  I would argue the exact opposite is true.  In the times I have struggled with depression, it feels like an attack, like something is crushing me.  Depression is a cancer of the mind and soul.  If it goes untreated or unchecked it will consume you.  And just like cancer, sometimes despite the best efforts of the afflicted and those around them, they succumb to the disease anyway.

Now there are a couple things Walsh wrote that I agree with, the first being that it is a fine line between expressing the sentiment of someone who commits suicide being free from their demons, and making it appear as though it would bring the same relief to someone else dealing with similar demons.  I know what people mean when they say, "he's a peace now" or "at least now he's free" and I think everyone else understands as well but I can understand how their could be a danger in someone who is struggling viewing phrases like that as a refuge to their pain.

Second, I agree with Walsh about the incredible guilt that suicide saddles with those who are left behind.  I have had two people in my life commit suicide and I feel intense guilt about each of them to this day.  One of them will have occurred 11 years ago in November, and I would say at least once a week something reminds me of the guilt I feel about my friends passing.  This is not to say that suicide is selfish or cowardly on the part of the person who commits it, it is only to say that suicide is devastating.  That's all.

I will leave you with one final thought.  I am not so arrogant as to think that it is impossible that Matt Walsh could be right on some level and I could be wrong.  Obviously I don't believe that, otherwise I wouldn't have taken the time to write this, but I won't say that it's impossible.  I will say this; there exists a place within oneself where the idea of hope and joy seem lost forever, even though that is not the reality to everyone else.  There exists a place so filled with darkness that it feels as though no light could penetrate it.  At this point, a person does not need a debate on whether or not they have a choice to live or die, they need our love and our prayers and a miracle to heal them the same way a miracle would cure someone of cancer or diabetes.

And I do believe it takes a miracle, and here's why: throughout human history we have persevered and survived as a result of the most basic instincts which are ingrained in our DNA.  That instinct is for self preservation.  Depression takes someone to a place where they will literally override the biology which has guided all of human existence and an act of God, not a choice, is the only way they can come back.