The Pains Of Adulthood

Adulthood is a funny thing. While legally it occurs when you turn 18 or 19 years old, most people agree they don't feel like an adult until well after that point. The tricky part is when exactly.

I suppose for some people it happens when they get married, or buy their first house, or when they tell people they're pregnant and everyone reacts like it's a good thing. Not for me though. While I've only experienced one of those things (matriage) and am hopefully on the cusp of another (buying a house, cross your fingers), I didn't feel like an adult until tonight. 

I was heading over to my friends house to watch the NBA Finals game. Now my friend had surgery on his ACL so I thought it might be nice to bring him some food. He asked for Taco Bell and I had no issues with his request. Unlike a lot of people I don't really mind that whatever you order at Taco Bell probably isn't actual food. I find it tasty so I don't really care that the main ingredient is sawdust.

I was pretty hungry by the time I pulled up to Taco Bell so I went with my standard order when I need to get my grub on; the Taco 12 Pack. I understand that this sounds like a lot of food, and it is but for some reason, I've always been able to consume large quantities iof tacos without any issues. For example, my all-time taco record occurred when I was 17. I was at a get together where Taco Bell had been "catered" in (aka someone's mom but a butt load of tacos) and I was the last one to eat. So I ate every last taco that was on that table and when I was done, I had put down 18 tacos. I still maintain had they not run out of tacos I could've eaten several more. Even within the past year I have crushed a taco 12 pack no fewer than twice without any negative reprocussions. 

Unfortunately tonight was different. As methodically took out a dozen tacos, I felt fine. As I finished watching the game, I felt fine. As I drove home even, I felt fine.   However, shortly after I walked throughy front door, everything changed. My stomach cramped and my intestines quivered. Only later would I realize this was the pain of my youth forsaking me. 

As I lay here nearly two hours later with whatever industrial chemicals make up taco meat still churning in my stomach, I know that this is what adulthood feels like.  We had a good run taco 12 pack, but our time together has come to an end. I'm an adult now, and Chipotle and I have a pretty good thing.